RSS

high-fives for the women and open-mouthed tongue kisses for the men

02 Mar

meet-spartans-poster.jpg

So…. I watched. out of utter boliaoness I watched. I know what ya thinking, but before you cry, let me just say that I, Dingo Chaos, will never EVER spend money on this type of show. Anyways……

Alot and i mean ALOT of ang mohs say this show sucks.

Rotten Tomato gave it 3% based on 40 reviews, ‘Scrapes the bottom of the cinematic barrel’ seems to be the general consensus

IMDB user’s gave it 2.5/10 based on 16,740 votes

Metacritic gave it a average score of 9/100, based on 11 reviews made.

I kinda agree really, but then again, what do ya expect?

I mean its kinda stupid to go into this movie and prepare yourself for academy awards-worthy story and performances, History has proven shows like this should be taken light heartedly, So if you go in and come out disappointed, well sucks for you. Anyways,

CAST (I will only list down those worth mentioning)

Sean Maguire – Leonidas

Not bad, he looks like the real dude, he speaks like him too. although his acting wasn’t really that funny.

Carmen Electra – Queen Margo

Hmmm. No comments. Not awful but not that good either. Well she always acts in silly shows, and it kinda ‘numbs’ me to see her act really. Only thing I’m interested is her boobs really. (AHHH COME’ON DON’T ACT ALL SAINTLY ON ME!)

Kevin Sorbo (AKA Mr Hercules) – Captain. (yes Captain. No name whatsoever. just ‘Captain’.)

WEEEEE I was kinda surprised and glad that he’s in the show – He’s like one of the factors why I can watch the show throughout.

(It is now that I shall share with you my deepest and darkest secret. I was a fan of ‘Hercules: The legendary Journey’ when I was young. 😀 )

*arhem* well anyways I think he acted good, even though he didn’t really have much dialog. nvm he show face can already. GAWD he is handsome. (giggle like a little girl. – shit I’m so homo sometimes.)

‘I am gona go Hercules on your ass!!’ -Captain

Jareb Dauplaise – Dilio

MAN-BOOBS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! lol a ‘slightly’ overweight dude drafted for the army lead by Leonidas. Funny chap.

Nicole Parker – Almost everybody in the show

lol from paris hilton to britney spears, She parodied all of them. She’s cute nevertheless. I think she kinda play her part well. She sounded like Parish Hilton, and she was damn irritating as Britney Spears.

Story

Story? where? OOOOOOOOHHH ok story, just a parody of 300, and probably every pop-culture reference, homosexuality issues, people, movies(some) and TV shows(some) out there.

Did I mention homosexuality? I did? ok.

This kinda movie you don’t really go in and expect a well done up story, cause its virtually impossible to do so with so much reference from other movies/stuffs out there.

Overall I still think its better than Epic Movie, also directed by one of the directors of this show. Epic Movie is a classic case of adding WAY TOO MUCH reference into one movie and ultimately’ making it into one big bowl of $2.50 rojak of a film.

OH OH OHHHH there’s also mucus, vomit, poo and more mucus in the show too. I counted like 35,204 scenes involving those.

One more thing to note is that there’s suppose to be 300 Spartans in the original movie, but in this show there’s only 13. Well I guess its better than Xerxes’s ‘100 zillion’. (not counting the… ‘CGI’ effect. HURHUR)

For the benefit of those who have never watch the Original 300(WOAH seriously you kidding me? GO WATCH IT! it is THE awesome!), it goes something like this:

The show starts by introducing the origins of the King, his birth(this part was not in the original.) his training, his marriage to queen Margo, birth of his son, and training.

later on, some dude belonging to xerxes comes and want offerings, King refused, dude gets kicked into the pit of death.

War starts. fight fight kill kill bam bam boom!

some people die, some people live. blahblah

End.

So what did they make fun of/joke about in the movie? I shall try to list down some that I can remember:

Homosexuality

Hercules

Grand Theft Auto: SA (YES! games are included too!)

Star Wars

Britney Spears

Chris Crocker

Borat

Homosexuality

Toy Story

Rocky (no shit.)

Homosexuality

Ugly Betty (Save the Cheerleader, Save the World. HAHA)

Happy Feet

Amercia’s Idol. (that kick was utterly……………. dreadful.)

Transformer

and Homosexuality.

There’s still a lottttt more. but aiya I lazy to write them down. OH YES! there’s oso shit mucus and poo too.

‘Deal or No Deal?’ -Fat guy from Borat

Music

haha I went and search for the music I will survive by Gloria Gaynor. Go figure.

Seriously, apart from that song I totally didn’t really enjoy the rest. Come to think of it, I don’t recall hearing any of ‘the rest’, did they have any apart from that song?? *shrug*

My Thoughts

This show heavily emphasizes on homosexuality, shit, poo and mucus wayyyyy too much. It comes to the point where 10mins into the show, you really get this ‘damn not again!’ feeling when they repeat the references all over.

But there are some parts that are rather funny. Like the Oracle part, and the ‘kicking every single irritating piece of crap into the pit of death’ part. Hmmm.. Ok the Penguin part was not bad lar
Do note that all this parts are agar from around the first 30mins of the show; after that it really starts to lose steam and things just gets… mundane. I won’t say it starts to slip downwards… just mundane lar, the laugh turns into giggles towards the end really.

‘high-fives for the women and open-mouthed tongue kisses for the men’ -King Leonidas

Sadly, I couldn’t really finish watching the credit.(for godamn obvious reasons!) I heard its kinda long and from teh ‘sneak’ i got, its seems funny. And for some strange reasons there are some scenes I read about in other people’s review that I have no recollection of. Perhaps it got cut or I just have a bad memory. Whatever.

Number of Plasma out of 5: plasma-star.jpgplasma-star.jpgblank-star2.jpgblank-star2.jpgblank-star2.jpg

Anywaysssss…….. As a bonus for going through this Review, I now provide you with NSFW ( Translate: Awesomeness) Peeks of Lindsay Lohan NUDE!!!!

WEEEE

‘Lindsay Lohan posed nude for a photo shoot with legendary photographer Bert Stern.’

WHAT? no N*pples you say?! well a Clue from the Old man living in the Mountain of Awesomeness:

‘To make darkness into light, Stars into… erm.. uhmmm… ehhh.. round round thingys, one must see the big peekture!!’  –

Awesomed Old Man

Advertisements
 
Leave a comment

Posted by on March 2, 2008 in Uncategorized

 

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

 
%d bloggers like this: