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Again

23 Mar

I slept early ytd… actualli is i accidentally fell asleep thus no reply.. i was msging Dee…. and… Well… i think i went crazy again….

Haiz…… why isit tat alwaes… there is nothing wrong… I have to go and make sumthing wrong happen?? nothing wrong. yet everythings wrong…

why isit that i don wan to Quarrel… and yet… I just cannot control myself.. and start to quarrel? I don wan… yet i wan…

And then now comes the even greater part……

How did all this started? Jus because of a Stupid Address…. WAH KAOZ. can things get more stupid than this??????? I say this. is not because i blame her… This is a smalll matter lor… and yet ME. the stupid one… have to make make make.. make until the thing grow SOOOOOO big… For wat? FOr wat? FOR WAT? FOR NOTHING… I reeli donnoe wat the hell is wrong wif me.

Haiz……. anyways…. there was oso this thing… whereby i gave out a suggestion ASKING her whether was it a good idea tat we shld try to clear our tots for this next few daes.. be4 resuming our relationship.. meaning to say.. leave each other alone for awhile.. i only SUGGESTED it… I only asked her for her opinion. cax i believe that this sort of things shld be discussed upon first be4 making a decision. I NEVER say that i INSIST on doing it my way… and then.. she has to reply me as if i’ve already made a decision… and start to blabber stuffs which i reeli don get it…. and of all things.. she has to pull in another guy..

THAT reeli pissed me off…… HAIZ….. Alll i did was gave a suggestion… I wanted her to be part of everything i do. since this IS a relationship and it concerns the both of us.. rite? if she didnt lyk the idea… Fine.. she can jolly well say NO.

sumtimes… i jus think tat i shld chop off my hands. and sew up my mouth.. so tat i am forced to kip quiet… all i wan.. is to make this relationship a better one… Yet… all i did was make this relationship worse….

WHY? WHY? WHY??

Dee.. if u don lyk the idea of us staying apart… then good. cax i think i too, will miss u terribly…. Its my fault… that all this started… but wats the use of saying it.. When i don seem to improve????? haiz….

What can i do? Sighs…… how i wish things were so easy….. how i wish… BLAH. wishes are nothing….. Forget it.

All i want.. is to have a nice quiet relationship….. where everythings normal… where we can be lovey dovey at times… where we can show our concern and love for each other… we can stay happy.. knowing tat we have each other for company… and when we quarrel… we quarrel over the rite things… and after quarreling.. we kiss and make up….. As for the rest… I reeli don mind whether we have it or not lor…

Im sick and tired of all this… i wan to change.. i wan to fight this battle… no use complaining here…. I fight for Dee.. cax she is my hope.

🙂

Dam sux… my cough is not residing… it has been 3 weeks already.. and im still coughing… quite seriously too…. i think i got sum serious illness liao lar… Im gona gib it til this sundae… if it still doesnt improve.. im gona go see a doc. bo pian.. cannot go now.. cax i nid to work to earn money… so yea…….

hmm.. i jus hope after Dee has read this.. She can be more forgiving of me…. but.. i think she has already been very very fogiving? boooO

Genererry genererry genererry~ LOL. ahahaha

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Posted by on March 23, 2005 in Uncategorized

 

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